The Great Zuckerfrei Diet

Leaving the facebook ecosystem is pretty much like giving up a major addiction. Trust me, I know: I am a wholehearted coffee addict! At some point in my life, I actively gave in to coffee addiction. Literally told myself: a lifetime of pleasure is worth more than two weeks of headaches. This is my one addiction and I owned it 🙂

Facebook tentacles were the next hardest thing for me to escape: it took me a decade. I haven’t had a Google app on a phone in a while, but Whatsapp has managed to stay installed on my device forever. It took an unexpected ally for me to succeed: the iPad. Aparently, my story – our stories – with modern technology are epic tales of giants in the vein of literary classics. Like Thor or Goliath, these giants also go by a single name only: Apple, Google, Facebook. They have no surnames and they need none, for they’re in the business of getting up close and personal.

I left facebook itself years ago. Facebook is an online disease that only tech-savvy or young people seem able to recover from. The place where both the Internet and general education went to die. No-one needs this cancer; even the people still on it could easily be elsewhere if everyone decided at once where this else would be (wink: Matrix, Mastodon, Diaspora, even Twitter would be better despite having been temporarily overrun by beasts with horns)… The problem was that facebook bought itself the next two direct competitors. Legislators recently started cracking down on anti-competitive acquisitions by giant tech companies, but it’s too late. The complexity of an online world gave this century’s companies a much longer runway than Microsoft ever had in the 90s.

With my expat family and my German class all on Whatsapp and nothing else, I just couldn’t cut the cord. Until last week, when I got an iPad mini. For me, the beautiful thing about the iPad wasn’t the poorly adapted application interfaces (yes kids, that was sarcasm;)). I mean, the big screen is nice, but not with a tiny font size, nor for apps too lazy to do something more with the extra space. No… the beautiful thing was that facebook didn’t bother making an official Whatsapp for iPad. Go Signal!

I had my out. I’m not even keeping said iPad, but I made it out. After a decade, I am barely on any social platform and I am definitely free of Mark Zuckerberg. Only coffee retains control over me. I am fine with that.

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